Saturday, March 22, 2014
Lessons Learned From Real Life (#2)
If You're A Doctor Who Has Been Prescribing Viagra To One Of Your Patients For A While And He Suddenly Dies, You Must Not Under Any Circumstances Go To The Funeral Home And Try To Assure His Widow That It Wasn't The Viagra That Killed Him.
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*Otherwise, you might have to suffer the utter humiliation of hearing her respond, "What Viagra?" [A true story]
Who's Handicapped Here?
Businesses And Offices That Don't Don't Place Their Handicapped Parking Spaces Nearest To Their Front Doors Deserve A Good Whipping, Preferably With A Stout Cane.
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*Or perhaps to be run over with a wheelchair, repeatedly.
Sunday, March 16, 2014
How Often, You Ask?
How Often Do I Renew My Magazine And Newspaper Subscriptions? Oh, Periodically.
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*And when do I plant my annuals? About every year, of course.
Monday, March 10, 2014
The Defense Is Restless
The Lawyers For Oscar Pistorius Aren't Very Optimistic About The Outcome Of His Murder Trial In South Africa Because They Know Their Client Doesn't Have A Leg To Stand On.
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*And the former Olympic runner apparently doesn't have the stomach for it either (he threw up in court this week).
Friday, March 07, 2014
Noses Like Bloodhounds' Have They
Police Busted A Marijuana-Growing Operation At The Edge Of Our Town This Week. Some Friends Of Mine Intend To Go Out There And Sniff Around For Any Additional Evidence.
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*All in the interest of assisting local law enforcement, of course.
Sunday, March 02, 2014
Lessons Learned From Real Life (#1)
Before You Ask Someone When Her Baby Is Due, You Had Better Make Damned Sure She Is Pregnant.
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*Otherwise, you will have to contend with a very angry, very large woman.
Saturday, March 01, 2014
Of Helen Jean Nugent, Belated
Short Without Ever
Being Small, Epic Haiku
Of The Human Kind
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*Sorry, Helen Jean, wherever you are now; it shouldn't take a year to come up with a mere seventeen syllables.
