Friday, July 17, 2009
Epitaph(s) For A Lifetime
I have been working on my own epitaph for, oh, the last ten years. I don't know why I think it is important to have; it's just that today's graveyards are pretty boring without them (and those ones that call themselves "gardens of memory" and have all the stones as flat to the ground as possible are pathetic -- no personality, no character, and the one nearest to me proved to be a seven-figure swindle). Anyway, here's my growing list so far, from first to current:
'Heaven Should Be A True Paradise -- No Editors!"
"Wherever I've Gone Now, There I Am"
"Never Really An Oddball So Much As A Man At Odds"
"Pardon Me, Is This Space Taken?"
"Buddha, Jesus, Mohammed, and Moses Never Wrote Anything Down"
"I'd Rather Be W. C. Fields"
"I'll Be With Mark Twain In The Smoking Lounge"
"Now I Really Do Hate The Color Green"
"Believe It Or Not, But The Hokey-Pokey Really Is What It's All About"
"Haven't Seen Houdini Yet (Hmmm?)"
"Ah, Infinitely More Time To Write?"
"What If There Were No Hypothetical Situations?"
"We Are All Hypotheticals"
"Everything, According To Zen, Is:
"True
"False
"Meaningless
"All Of The Above"
"Bob Dylan: Life Is Just One Big Prison Yard; Some Of Us Are Prisoners And Some Of Us Are Guards"
"Better Your Ear To The Ground Than Your Nose To The Grindstone"
"Sound Is The Just Now; Time Is A Whisper"
"I Never Owned Stocks, So They Never Owned Me"
"We Don't Master Technology, It Masters Us"
"So Many Regrets, So Little Time"
"Multi-Tasking Means The Death of Excellence"
"Multi-Tasking Is About The Same As Multiple Gunshot Wounds"
"Tom Lehrer: It Is A Sobering Thought Indeed To Realize That, When Mozart Was My Age, He'd Been Dead For 25 Years"
"As A Writer, He Was Mostly Underappreciated But Undaunted"
"Zen: Those Who Say Do Not Know. Those Who Know Do Not Say"
"Multitasking: The 8th Deadly Sin"
"Death Be Not Proud, He Was Pretty Easy Pickin's"
"John Bremner: It Is Better To Be Fooled Occasionally Than To Be Suspicious Constantly"
"You Can Outlive Many Things, But Never Your Deepest Regrets"
*
(Work in progress)
'Heaven Should Be A True Paradise -- No Editors!"
"Wherever I've Gone Now, There I Am"
"Never Really An Oddball So Much As A Man At Odds"
"Pardon Me, Is This Space Taken?"
"Buddha, Jesus, Mohammed, and Moses Never Wrote Anything Down"
"I'd Rather Be W. C. Fields"
"I'll Be With Mark Twain In The Smoking Lounge"
"Now I Really Do Hate The Color Green"
"Believe It Or Not, But The Hokey-Pokey Really Is What It's All About"
"Haven't Seen Houdini Yet (Hmmm?)"
"Ah, Infinitely More Time To Write?"
"What If There Were No Hypothetical Situations?"
"We Are All Hypotheticals"
"Everything, According To Zen, Is:
"True
"False
"Meaningless
"All Of The Above"
"Bob Dylan: Life Is Just One Big Prison Yard; Some Of Us Are Prisoners And Some Of Us Are Guards"
"Better Your Ear To The Ground Than Your Nose To The Grindstone"
"Sound Is The Just Now; Time Is A Whisper"
"I Never Owned Stocks, So They Never Owned Me"
"We Don't Master Technology, It Masters Us"
"So Many Regrets, So Little Time"
"Multi-Tasking Means The Death of Excellence"
"Multi-Tasking Is About The Same As Multiple Gunshot Wounds"
"Tom Lehrer: It Is A Sobering Thought Indeed To Realize That, When Mozart Was My Age, He'd Been Dead For 25 Years"
"As A Writer, He Was Mostly Underappreciated But Undaunted"
"Zen: Those Who Say Do Not Know. Those Who Know Do Not Say"
"Multitasking: The 8th Deadly Sin"
"Death Be Not Proud, He Was Pretty Easy Pickin's"
"John Bremner: It Is Better To Be Fooled Occasionally Than To Be Suspicious Constantly"
"You Can Outlive Many Things, But Never Your Deepest Regrets"
*
(Work in progress)
Comments:
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I have but one epitaph that will hopefully be torched into my stone:
"I did my best while I was here and it's too late for any gripes now after I've gone."
Texasbacksass
Now if I may comment on one of yours: "Now I Really Hate The Color Green"
Considering society in the U S today I don't even find it interesting much less remarkable how willingly cheerful people grab onto words like green and other word phrases as to make them popular. Green makes about as much sense as bush's color charted alert system.
One word phrase I absolutely detest is "Illegal Immigrant."
There is no such thing as an illegal immigrant nor is there any state or federal definition or law referring to illegal immigrant.
On the other hand there are "Illegal Aliens" aplenty in this nation that are no more by definition than "Wannabe Immigrants" that would rather break U S law with their first illegal step into this nation than exersizing dilligent patience and wait their turn like tens of thousands of others that have legally petitioned to immigrate here.
More than a few I have enjoyed in colloquy have tried, unsuccessfully I might add, to prove me wrong on this issue.
Equal justice under the law applied and enforced still means something to this U S Citizen.
Texasbacksass
"I did my best while I was here and it's too late for any gripes now after I've gone."
Texasbacksass
Now if I may comment on one of yours: "Now I Really Hate The Color Green"
Considering society in the U S today I don't even find it interesting much less remarkable how willingly cheerful people grab onto words like green and other word phrases as to make them popular. Green makes about as much sense as bush's color charted alert system.
One word phrase I absolutely detest is "Illegal Immigrant."
There is no such thing as an illegal immigrant nor is there any state or federal definition or law referring to illegal immigrant.
On the other hand there are "Illegal Aliens" aplenty in this nation that are no more by definition than "Wannabe Immigrants" that would rather break U S law with their first illegal step into this nation than exersizing dilligent patience and wait their turn like tens of thousands of others that have legally petitioned to immigrate here.
More than a few I have enjoyed in colloquy have tried, unsuccessfully I might add, to prove me wrong on this issue.
Equal justice under the law applied and enforced still means something to this U S Citizen.
Texasbacksass
# posted by 
: 12:32 PM
: 12:32 PM
A Tale From the "Darkside"?
"The police were stupid."
Mr. Prez one of your halves has slipped out and is very regretably and very onesided politically showing.
Texasbacksass
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"The police were stupid."
Mr. Prez one of your halves has slipped out and is very regretably and very onesided politically showing.
Texasbacksass
# posted by : 5:16 PM
: 5:16 PM << Home
